Reality Check

Last October we found out that our apartment strata was in desperate need of repairs to the tune of around $6 million dollars.

At the time we felt completely blindsided as we had already paid several thousands of dollars in special assessments since we bought in 2008. We were also completely pissed off because the situation was the clear result of negligence on the part of the property manager and previous owners.

So we got hit with this news in October and then pretty much heard nothing else from the strata since then. While they were silent hubby and I were busy looking at all our options. 

Could we sell? Should we sell? Could we re-mortgage to acquire the nearly $100,000 we would need to pay?

The answer - not suruprisingly - to all of those questions was no.  We were in a pickle...in the worst position we could imagine.  So we waited it out...hoping that the strata council would figure out a way to make this all better.

On Wednesday night the owners were brought together again and the first thing we were handed as we walked in the door was a breakdown of the costs for the repairs showing our units share:

Yikes... 

The meeting was - to be a frank - a joke. Some people were still bitching about what should have been done in the past but wasn't. Others - clearly in better financial sistuations than us - were basically asking where do I pay?

Mostly there was confusion.  We talked about the repairs that were needed (pretty much replacing everything above the foundation). We talked about how those repairs could be completed (all at once, building by guidnling or componenet by component).  We talked about financing and loan options. 

One owner suggested we just "knock all the buildings down and build 6 new high rises in their place" (yeah...because we have enough money to do that!).  And others talked about getting a full property valuation to sell off the land and buildings and walk away.

I kept looking around at the faces of my neighbours - some who I like quite a lot and other who I  wanted to punch in the face as they asked the same question for the 10th time - and I was struck by the enormity of the situation. Most of us were facing the very real prospect of losing our homes.

What a shitty bit of bad luck for all of us.  Because thats what it is - bad luck.

It could happen to anyone. And while it feels good to bitch and moan and place blame on others at the time it doesn't change the reality. Our buildings need repairs and we have to pay for them. Anyone who can't pay their share will have to get out - whether that's by selling at a loss or walking away completely.

I love our house. It's the only home my youngest daughter has ever known.  It is comfortable and familiar and cozy and perfect for us. But it is just a house. We will find another if we have to and we will make that place just as much a home.

Hubby and I have some work to do and some decisions to make and we will do what we think is best for our little family. Because sometimes that's what you have to do when you are a grown up. Make the tough decisions...

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Side note: the morning after this meeting I received some very sad news about something a dear friend was dealing with that really put my own situation into perspective.

I love how life works that way sometimes. Just when you start feeling really sorry for yourself you get a little wake up call that reminds you just how good you actually have it.

I have a husband I adore and two amazing little girls that own my heart completely. I could live in a cardboard box and as long as I had them with me I would be okay.

Be happy for what you have.

Be grateful for all you have been given.

Remember what's really important.

It's easy to turn phrases like those into lip service...I do that myself quite often. But they are more than that. They are the simple rules by which we should live.  And I will work harder to do just that.

Love. Period.

Today is Mothers Day. I got to sleep in and awoke to the sight of my girls and hubby bringing me breakfast in bed.

Not too shabby...

The girls gave me the cards and presents they had made. Little one gave me a frame covered in glitter and foam hearts. It's not Mother's Day unless my bed winds up covered with glitter! 

Oldest had painted a small ceramic pot and planted a marigold in it. Unfortunately she put a few too many coats on and so the paint was still wet. So it's living on the deck for a while..,

After extending my lounge in bed time as long as possible...I finally joined the family in the kitchen where the kids had pulled out the play doh. 

Hubby had been asking me repeatedly what I wanted to do on Mother's Day and I was indecisive. But one idea had been percolating for a while - to get my first tattoo.

I have been considering getting one for years but couldn't decide on what it should be. I always thought it would include the girls names but I couldn't pick a design I liked.

Then I saw the perfect one on Pinterest. I knew it was the right one immediately. Simple and perfect. 

As hubby left for his soccer game and the girls and I headed out to meet my mum and Nana for brunch the idea kept growing. I wanted to get it today.

We had a lovely brunch - I'm always so happy when we get the four generations together. Especially how happy it makes my lovely nana to spend time with the girls.

When we got home I asked hubby to call his co-worker that is a tattoo artist and see if the shop was opem and if they had any openings. They did. One cancellation. I was booked for 3:30.

Cue the nerves. Cue the excitement.

We decided to take the kids with us - they are both very curious and we want them to learn about things from us rather than others. And hubby could always leave with them if he needed to.

They were great. And the entire process was (relatively) painless. 30 minutes from start to finish. 

I am in LOVE with my new ink. And already thinking about my next one.

From my perspective this is what life is all about. Love. Period.

Happy Mother's Day!

Setbacks...

I have hit my first roadblock...and I am not happy about it.

On my run earlier this week I felt a "tweak" in my back. I came home, took a very hot shower, popped a couple of Advil and figured I had dodged that bullet. Not so much...

After my next run that "tweak" turned into full on back spasms. Which have spread to my hip and down my right leg. I'm now in agony every time I move. 

In fact it took me just as long to get off the couch as my 90-year-old Nanny. True story...

So instead of moving on to week 6 of my 5K training program and tackling my first 8 minute run...I am booking physiotherapy appointments and popping pain killers every 4 hours like clockwork.

And this is where my will and dedication gets tested...because this is where I would usually start feeling sorry for myself, get frustrated over being hurt and give up. But not this time. 

Because this time I know I can take the time I need to heal and just get right back into it. Even if it sets me back a few weeks...even if I put some weight back on...even if I have to start right back at the beginning again. I already did it once and so I know I can do it again...

And because I have some amazing ladies cheering me on and ready to run by my side again. Just as soon as I'm ready...

Hopefully I don't keep them waiting too long...

Wordless Wednesday: Growing up before my eyes...

This weekend the girls and I visited our "old park" as in the one near our old house. I miss that house and that park and that neighbourhood so much that I never turn down a request to visit.

This time - as my girls climbed one of the many structures together - I had a deja vu moment. 

And so I tried to recreate it: 

Top: Sept 2011 Bottom: May 2013

Oh what a difference 20 months makes...

(I am totally putting a brick on their head...and soon!)

Living in the Moment

This weekend was one of those that remind us Vancouverites why we live here.  A reminder that the reason we suffer through 9 months of gray clouds and rain is for days like the one that we woke up to on Saturday.

When the entire city emerges from hibernation to hit the patios and beaches and parks around the city. When everyone is wearing shorts and tank tops and flip flops…in May.

And because on days like this we know that it really is the BEST place on earth to live. (until it starts to rain again…which is supposed to be on Sunday…just in time for Mother’s Day…of course)

Unfortunately we had to enjoy all our sunny day adventures this weekend without hubby.  He was stuck inside all weekend painting the daycare…oh the things we do for our kids…but we know there will be many more weekends to spend as a family.  He was there in spirit…

The key to making the most of sunny weekends that sneak up and surprise us is that you have to be willing to throw all your plans out the window and go with the flow. For us that meant ditching gymnastics classes inside smelly old gyms in exchange for playing on the deck in the sunshine…

…and welcoming home aunties that had been in Mexico for way too long!...

 

They brought gorgeous little dresses back with them.  As well as their photobombing skills.

…and discovering new beaches…

 

 

 

 

 

…where we almost got swallowed by the mud….

 

 

 …but instead managed to surf our way back out…

...and up to the sandy beach...

 

After a great day at the beach we collected a tired hubby and drove out to a friend’s house for dinner.  Where the kids played in the yard…and the adults lounged on the deck with a cold beverage and good conversation.

The kids all played nicely (for the most part) and only one of them didn’t manage to stay awake until 11:30 when we finally had to make the call to head home.

It was my little love that couldn’t keep her eyes open anymore…and I’m pretty sure that’s because I suckered her into a cuddle on my lap under a nice warm blanket.

What can I say?  That is the one thing I miss most about the baby phase…there was no way I was giving up on this cuddle.

Sunday morning dawned just as bright and sunny as the previous day and we started it off with some homemade French toast. 

(I hate to cook so the fact they got offered anything other than cereal is a minor miracle…)

After breakfast – facing a day with no plans until swimming lessons at 5pm – I let the kids decide the itinerary.  They chose visiting the park by our “old house”…

 

 

…sushi for lunch...

 

Youngest pointed at this guy and said "They have a Frosty the Snowman here..." I was genuinely at a loss on how to respond to that one.

 …finding a new park we had never been to before…

…heading out to UBC to get some frozen yogurt for a treat (finally used that damn Groupon!)….

 

…where we discovered a little fountain that kept them entertained for almost 45 minutes….

…and I can’t believe that neither of them actually fell in since this is what they did the whole time...

 

Then it was home for a little rest before heading off for swimming lessons.

By the time we got home the kids were DONE! They didn’t even try to fight bedtime…

And that…my friends…is how you live in the moment.  You get in the car and just go. 

And just pray you are wearing the right shoes for wherever you wind up.

Conversations with my Kids

One of the things I love the most about my kids getting older is the conversations that we have. About any and all subjects and most of the time I wind up either laughing or crying.

Usually a little bit of both.

My oldest daughter just turned 7 and suddenly the subjects she wants to talk about have changed dramatically.  It amazes me that she can go from laughing hysterically at Applejack's hijinx on My Little Pony to asking me why there are some kids that don't have enough food to eat - all in the span of a few seconds.

She definitely keeps me on my toes.

I am also seriously gobsmacked (god I love that word) with her memory!  She remembers the tiniest little details about EVERYTHING! And she is also always listening...even when I wish she wasn't.

We drove by a restaurant the other day and our conversation went like this:

     M: "We went there once, right Mummy?"

     Me: glancing over briefly "Ummm...I don't think so."

     M: "Yes we did...it was a special day...and they had all kinds of food on tables...and  
          Nana was there and T was just a little baby and you had to hold her. And I had
          waffles."

And then I realized she was right...we had gone there for Mother's Day Brunch when she was just 3 years old. So it was 4 years ago we went to that restaurant for the first and only time and she remembered it as if it was yesterday. 

She shocked me with iron trap of a brain just the other day.  I have been trying to plant a few seeds about going to Disneyland in January. She has insisted that the next time we go she wants us to surprise her on the way to the airport - but since one of the reasons we are going is for me to run a 5K and for the girls to participate in the kids dashes I kind of want them to have some time to prepare. 

(plus...there is no way I can keep this a secret for the next 8 months. No. Way.)

So I casually mentioned that I might want to run a race at Disneyland 'some time in the future' and did you know they have kids races too? 

"Is that the run that your friend did Mummy," she said. "You know..the Tinkerbell one that your friend whose name starts with an N did?"

Yup...that would be the one.  The race she over heard me talking about to hubby back 4 months ago. The Tinkerbell Half Marathon that my friend Nicole did. How did she remember that?

I told her she was right (as usual) and did she want to do a run too. 

"Yes, yes, yes!" she shouted. "And I don't want the trip to be a surprise now. I need to train. When we get home I need to exercise."

And that she did...


The other day she asked me if we would ever have a tsunami here.  Now we live in the Pacific Northwest and just a few blocks from the ocean so it's not an impossible thought...and I told her that.  She immediately started to cry.

(See...they keep you on your toes!)

When I hugged her and asked her why she was crying she said a teacher had told her a story about a little boy in Japan who got caught in a Tsunami and he and his parents were running up a hill but his parents decided to go back to save some "stuff" and they died and he was all alone. Then she begged me to not go back for 'stuff' if that happens to our house. 

Can't we just talk about My Little Pony some more?

With my youngest it's usually a little easier.  The conversations we have are still pretty short and usually pretty easy.

"I wish I was you Mummy...because you get to wear sparkly stuff on your eyes."

"Mummy...can I wave to you at the window at daycare?  And can you wave to me as you drive by?"

See...easy peasy...

But yesterday she hit me with this one in the car:  "Is it okay if I love Daddy more than you?"

Ouch...

I looked in the rear view mirror at her little face and saw very clearly she wasn't trying to be mean or hurt my feelings...it was just an honest question that she needed an answer to. 

"Well," I said. "If I'm honest with you that does kind of hurt my feelings but you are also always allowed to feel how you feel. Can I ask  you why you love Daddy more?"

(Why oh why do I ask these questions?)

"Because he let's me watch My Little Pony more than you." she said. 

Phew...and the conversation comes full circle.
 

High Five for Friday

It has been far too long since I have taken a moment on a Friday to reflect on the week and all the good things that happened.  In fact I haven't done a High Five for Friday post since last September. 

Bad Kelly...

This felt like the perfect week to get back into it because this week had so many things to be thankful for...

#1 - Sunny Friday Mornings
Once a week I try to take my oldest daughter to school.  It means getting to work a little later and then having to work through my lunch or stay a little later but it's totally worth it. I want my daugther to know I am invested in her schooling and I want her teachers to know that as well.  It's a bonus when the morning is sunny and the kids are cooperative enough for us to get there early enough to spend some time on the swings:

#2 - Twin Day...and why my daughter is awesome.
A few weeks ago my oldest came home with a notice saying that April 26 would be Twin Day and the children were encouraged to pair up with a friend and dress the same. She had recently attended a birthday party where all the girls had received the same t-shirt and she told me they would all be wearing that.  But this morning she threw me a curve ball when she came out of her room wearing something completely different.  When I asked she said one of her friends didn't come to the party and had no one to pair up with so she decided to pair up with her instead.  Because "I don't want her to feel left out...that's not nice."  Oh how I love that kid...

#3 - Nanny's Weekly Visit
Every week my mum and grandmother come for dinner. I think its very important to teach my girls how important family is and as Nanny will be turning 90 this year we don't know how much longer we will have her around. This week Nanny gave their girls their birthday present - a doll house.  The girls were over the moon and the smile on Nanny's face when they hugged her and kissed her was priceless.  

#4 - Shutting the Door on Me
I do my runs at night - usually leaving the house right at bedtime - and every time my youngest insists on closing the door behind me. What's she is wearing when she closes the door on me depends on how far into the bedtime routine we are.  This week - on Wednesday - she wished me good luck on my "walk/run" (she can never just call it a run!) - wearing just her underpants and her necklace.  Seriously...how cute is she?

#5 - Overcoming Mental Obstacles
When I first downloaded the Ease into 5K app I looked ahead at every week and scared the leaving bejesus out of myself with how hard each week got. Week 3 scared me with its jump to 3 minute runs from the previous week's 90 seconds. But week 4 doubled that again with a jump to 6 MINUTES! Without a gentle push from my running partner I probably would have been content to run week 3 forever...instead I took the plunge and crushed that 6 minute stint. Moving on...

What a week it has been...what were your highlights?